


need a little time to wake up

by cheinsaw



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: ARO MAMI, Aromantic, Gen, One-Sided Akemi Homura/Kaname Madoka, One-Sided Kamijou Kyousuke/Miki Sayaka, Queerplatonic Relationships, Time Loop, one-sided madoka/sayaka
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-20
Updated: 2014-10-20
Packaged: 2018-02-21 23:18:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2485895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheinsaw/pseuds/cheinsaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mami is special to all of them. That much never changes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	need a little time to wake up

**Author's Note:**

> i haven't watched madoka in like 2 years i'm so sorry if anyone is ooc. also i haven't seen rebellion so this is tv show canon

Mami is calm, collected, the leader Madoka and Sayaka need. They come to her with their problems, magical or otherwise, and she tries her best to help. It's what a good senpai should do. So when Sayaka flops down on Mami's couch in overblown desperation, her head almost on the floor and her leg swung over the side, Mami is all too willing to lend an ear to the girl's troubles.

"What should I do?" she whines. It has to do with the boy she likes, the one she healed in return for a sword and a soul gem, who still doesn't seem to know she exists.

Mami is thoughtful. "You understand, right? Contracting for someone else's benefit doesn't mean they'll automatically do what you want. It seems unfair, but... Consider that Kamijou-kun has feelings of his own, too."

Sayaka groans. "I guess I should just talk to him, huh."

"Yes, that's usually the best course of action. Any relationship needs communication."

"Yeah, you're right." Sayaka pauses for a moment. "Have you ever been in love, Mami-san?"

Mami smiles, sips her tea. "No, I'm afraid not."

" _Lucky_ ," Sayaka mumbles.

* * *

She's tried to avoid Homura this timeline, just like the last. And Homura knows this. Every timeline, as far back as she can remember, Mami was distant. Sometimes she was kind, back when Homura was still unsure and shaky. But never nowadays. No matter how many times Homura rewinds, the vulnerable parts of herself are too hidden and cold and locked away now. Mami Tomoe will never again be the kind older sister figure she once was. Not to Homura, at least.

But Homura can remember. Oh, she can remember, no matter how she tries to forget.

She remembers crying, breaking down as the walls of the labyrinth dissolve around her, leaning against Mami's shoulder despite her physical frailties and her disdain for being touched. "It's alright," Mami says in the memory, stroking Homura's long hair all the way down her back where one of her braids has unraveled. "It's okay. It will be okay."

"I love her so much," Homura wails over Madoka's dead body.

"I love her too, Akemi-san," she says so gently, her voice blunted with held-back tears.

"You don't love her like I do." It comes out sharp and bitter, and Homura hates the way the words taste. She hadn't meant it that way.

Mami is quiet, tracing circles on Homura's back as Homura shakes and trembles in her arms. "No, that's right. I don't. You're right. But..."

Homura can't stop crying. She doesn't want to hear the next words.

"There are so many kinds of love. But I believe Kaname-san loved you too."

* * *

"God. I was so stressed. My dad thought I was _dating_ you. Can you imagine?" Kyouko scoffs. Bringing Mami home to meet her family had been kind of embarrassing—they'd seemed to like her, but also did not neglect to mention how Kyouko had never brought friends home before.

"No offense, but I'd rather not," Mami says delicately, then sips her soda. Kyouko makes a mental note to make it up to her somehow—she knows Mami isn't a big fan of fast food, but Kyouko had just been craving burgers, and Mami was kind enough to go along with it.

"Sorry, I mean, you already know I'm gay as hell."

"Yes, I've noticed," Mami smiles. "It's hard not to."

"But I dunno, I don't think I'm gay for _you_. So it's weird." It's been hard for Kyouko to sort out her feelings for Mami —the line between romance and friendship is blurry for her, if it's even there at all. She knows she loves Mami. But she doesn't want to, like, _date_ Mami. But it's also definitely not friendly love.

"That's a relief, because I don't have romantic feelings for anyone."

" _Anyone_?" Kyouko repeats, shoving four fries into her mouth at once. "Like, never?"

"Never."

"Oh. Cool. So we're chill."

"Yes, Kyouko-san. We are chill."

Kyouko cracks up laughing, and slings an arm around Mami's shoulders. "God. I love you."

Mami closes her eyes, a smile spreading over her face. "I love you just the same."

* * *

 "Mami-san, can I... talk to you?" Madoka's hands are shaky, but Mami pretends not to see.

"Of course. Please come inside."

Madoka smiles, looking almost relieved. "Thanks."

"So, no Kyubey today?" Mami asks as Madoka's slipping her shoes off in the entryway. "Where is he?"

"Ummm, I left him with Sayaka-chan. I didn't really... want him here when I talked to you," she laughs nervously.

Mami nods, moving to sit on the couch. "That's understandable. It's okay. What did you want to talk about?"

Madoka fidgets with the hem of her skirt. "It's embarrassing..."

"I won't judge you," Mami says, folding her hands in her lap.

Madoka looks down. And closes her eyes. And blurts. "I think I like girls but I also like boys and I don't really know what to do and I think I might be in love with Sayaka-chan but she's with Kyouko and then Homura-chan is—"

"Kaname-san, slow down." Mami smiles gently. "One thing at a time."

Madoka takes a deep breath. "Am I weird?"

"Oh, Kaname-san. Of course not. You like Miki-san, did you say?"

"Yeah, but I don't think I could tell her..."

"You don't have to, then. Though I'm sure if you did she wouldn't be upset with you."

"I still... I guess I just worry too much, right?" Madoka does her little heartbreaking nervous laugh again, and Mami wants nothing more than to give Madoka a big hug, to keep her safe forever. She pulls Madoka into her arms, and, blessedly, Madoka hugs back.

"Mami-san, do you...?" Madoka asks, her nose against Mami's collarbone.

Mami is very quiet, very still. "No," she says.

"Oh," Madoka says in a small voice.

"Please don't get me wrong. I've never... liked anyone that way. Boys, girls... I just don't."

"That's actually kind of a relief," Madoka giggles. "For a second I thought you were the only one out of all of us."

And in that moment, Mami realizes it: she belongs.


End file.
